The past weekend was a ‘questionable’ one. It was a weekend where I reflected where I am in life, the small changes that I’m facing (losing a stable freelance job), and the question of how to move forward. It was also a weekend where my mum advised that I should not stay in the same company for too long and find a better place to go to, which is what everyone should do anyway. But while thinking it through, I became a little afraid, unsure, and muddled.
So, I decided to sit down and have a talk with God.
The conversation started with me saying “I don’t know” so many times, because I didn’t know if moving on is a good idea in terms of where I want to go in life. I was worried I would have to give up my dream along the way, and I didn’t know what to do. It all started with a bunch of ‘I don’t knows’ but the conversation ended with clarity.
Funny, how a conversation with God can really bring you peace and clarity. I didn’t know how long I was talking to Him, but I knew I slept rather late last night. AND I slept with a smile. He realigned my path to His and now I know what to do. Here's what I know:
My day job is merely a survival plan. It is stagnant with no growth because survival plans, once established, do not require any more tinkering with. I should not be spending my time and my thoughts worrying about this survival plan because God has it covered. Should I move forward and find another job? God will take care of that. Should I try to get another freelancing job? God will take care of that. This survival plan should be left to God to handle, after all, He will provide for my needs.
The plan that I should be focused on is God’s plan… the one where I continue to write for him. Writing novels, short stories, and running my blog are part of God’s plan. Yes, God’s plan is unpredictable and I have no control over what happens, but it is God’s plan. It may be odd to some that I have decided to focus my energy and time on God’s plan where the journey is uncertain, but it is what I am supposed to do.
The only reason why I have the ability to write is because God gave me that ability. Even if I don’t meet success immediately, I will trust that God knows best. So if anyone asks why I write fiction and keep my blog going, my answer is simple, “I'm writing for God.”
At the end of the day, I want to store up treasures in heaven. My survival plan is merely a plan to store up treasures on earth that will cease to exist once I die. The treasures in heaven however, will last forever. The day I meet God, I want Him to say, “Well done, good and faithful servant,” because that will mean I lived a life to the fullest of its purpose.