How many times...

... have you gotten the chance to relate to a Gotye song?

Once.

That's my answer.

I never really got the song, "Somebody that I used to know", until somebody I used to know decided to do exactly what the song speaks about.

Honestly, why do people have to cut other people off? Worst part is they do it without explanation. The only thing I hope for them is that people they care about would cut them off too, then they would know how it feels like, and think twice before doing it again.

To somebody I used to know, I'm probably dead and non existent. Thank you, for making people feel insignificant, you do a terrific job at that. Unfortunately, I don't seek out revenge, and I think forgiving you may be my only option. I hope you have a nice life. 

(I prefer the Glee version, cause Darren Criss was spot on in his expressions, and... cause he's hot.)

I plan...

... to send my self published book to publishing houses after I graduate. (If you know contacts of publishing houses, do leave it in the comments below.)

2) to do a video when I hit 900 subs on my official writers blog.

3) to go on vacation after I grad and write my second book.

4) to make enough money and have a website next year.

5) to make my final film project for my degree a good one, so people can use it to spread awareness.

6) to increase my client base in ghostwriting.

7) to graduate on top of the class. (I know this may sound nerdy but it would be an accomplishment for me.)

8) to tick each of this off once they are done, so that I will do what I have planned to do.

Also, how do you increase the number of fans on your fan page? I wonder...

There's a little hate in...

...those words.

I don't know how to explain it, but you get what I mean when some words give off an angry emotion? Whether it's the style or the content, one can tell.

Rarely do I find myself writing words with a hint of dissatisfaction; it is always full blown. Cause the concoction of unsettling emotions cannot be hinted, right? I discovered today that it can. No, I was not angry at someone, rather, unsatisfied with a situation, hence hints of emotion slipped out through my fingers, leaving residue on my words.

That is when I find myself adding full stops to the end of a word. Like, Ok. Yea. No. Heavy. Possibly. and the list goes on. Usually, I don't just end with a full stop, it is an annoying habit of mind to leave trail of dots........ So, I guess if we've chatted long enough, you would know somethings up.

Mind you, I don't do it on purpose. I don't intend on leaving any residue in the words I type, but it just happens. Especially when I'm not trying to make it seem so, it happens.

Well, I sure do hope it doesn't affect my stories. Though it would be good if it were a story on anger.

Now I know why...

... writers go away, all by themselves, in a secluded place, just to write.

Personally, I'm planning to write my second novel in the beginning of next year.

I have the gist of the story laid out and I'm planning to build it up more, but I'll probably only do it at the end of the year, as I need to focus on my final semester.

I'm also planning to get away for a couple of weeks, or a month maybe, to somewhere not here.

Why? Because I need a different scenery and some time to get away from the same routine everyday. It's not that I do not like home, but the mundane routine I'm doing everyday kind of kills off any inspiration.

Hence, I think if I take a short trip just to focus on writing my first draft, I would be able to write better and more efficiently.

So, where am I planning to go? Well, that I do not know. I'll just be saving up money and when I have finally decided, I'll see if I have enough. Maybe... somewhere by the sea? Or somewhere comfortable outside the city?

I hope to be able to complete my 1st draft in that time alone so that I don't have to worry about having an incomplete story when I start working. And when I have finally earned enough, I will self publish again, or, find a publisher, but those are just plans that could change. For now, I'm just focusing on a trip.

If you have any suggestions on places to go, cheap and comfortable, possibly in Malaysia itself, do let me know in the comments below!

Shot Unaware

My heart hurts,
It hurts to the core,
Its like my soul has been ripped out,
And I can't take it any more.

You caught me by surprise,
Oh yes you did,
It was like an unexpected bullet to the heart,
shocked as the wound started to bleed.

All the good times we had,
And all the plans that we made,
Sounded so perfect and true,
But not away they start fade.

No words can describe the torment;
Something my mind can't even comprehend.
We had a good thing going,
Why did it have to end?

Now I'm left to dry,
As my hope for us you destroyed,
And in my clouded mind,
The dreams I had for us is void.

It'll take time to heal,
And it'll take a lot of tears,
But if it's what you have to do,
Then let me not be one of your fears.

I don't hate you,
And I don't blame you.
It's not me being understanding,
It's just that I can't even if I wanted to.

So, here's me forgiving you;
A pretty hard thing to do.
We can still be friends?
At least we have some memories to fall back to.


(Jeyna LSC © 12 July, 2012)